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What is it like caring for someone with dementia?

Laura Chin-See


My mum used to love cooking, gardening, looking after the house and chatting to people. The dementia diagnosis was a shock. Before 2020, we started to notice small changes. Mum was not sleeping properly, she was hallucinating and also seemed to struggle to walk without a stick.


Following mum's diagnosis with DLB (dementia with lewy bodies), I contacted our local Adult Social Care team through the council to start getting the support we needed. Mum had various assessments, including visits from the memory clinic. As her dementia progressed, we obtained a wheelchair and social care set up a bed downstairs (mum could no longer get up the stairs and it was unsafe) along with provide commodes. We were able to take mum to the park in her wheelchair and she loved this.


It is now almost 4 years since my mum's diagnosis. She is 83 years old and no longer has any mobility (she can't stand on her own). Mum has incontinence pants and pads. My dad is her main carer but she also has carers going in several times a day (arranged through social services) to wash, change and feed her.


It's been extremely hard to watch my mum go from being a happy mum to a person who can no longer feed herself and struggles to communicate. She also gets upset and angry very easily. It feels like a grieving process. I know we are extremely lucky that she is still being cared for at home but I worry every day.

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